Wednesday, December 7, 2022

On Joan Larkey's final days


Karin Gjording sent this year old photo and wrote the following about Joan Larkey who died in her Carmel Valley hom on December 4th, the 51st anniversary of shunryu Suzuki's death. She was 95, born on August 23, 1927. As one can see from what Karin wrote, I was wrong in my initial post to say she was in a care home. - dc

 

Karin: Joan fell 6 months ago, was hospitalized and then in rehab for about 3-4 weeks.  Then home with as much assistance as she could afford.  We set up a few hours daily of people coming in to prepare food, clean, etc. 

 

Joan died on December 4, between midnight and 4 am.  I gave her medicine at midnight, and when I went in to give her 4 am dose, she had gone.  She was cold to the touch so I think died closer to midnight.   (Leslie said maybe she was emulating Suzuki roshi…).   She had been unresponsive to people for several days.  And had mostly stopped talking quite a while ago, maybe 2-3 months.  She lay in bed almost all the time, by her own choice.   Seemed to be focused inwardly.  

I set up an altar in her room.  Around noon we had a brief service officiated by Shōgen from the Jamesburg area, He knew Joan.  Very few of us were there but it was a much appreciated service.  Leslie did communicating with larger ZC community, but it was really not possible for us to manage a 3 day sitting time for Joan.  And her partner Rick very much liked the several hours she was there, and the service. 

 

She lived in a beautiful house about a half mile west of the village, a home with spectacular view of the mountains.  Never in a home.  She had no dementia but she was pretty muddled in the last few months.  

Rick and Joan met about 6 years ago and shared a lot of things—theater particularly.  He has been living with Joan since Covid. He is in his 80s.  We haven’t written an obit.  I suppose we will.

*****


Leslie James adds


Joan stayed in her own beautiful home in Carmel Valley Village, up the hill on the north side of the valley looking over to Garland Park.  Joan designed and rebuilt the house when she moved there from Carmel.   Maybe Karin will remember the year.  No dementia, just the same old Joan.   Always curious, often with an opinion.   She and Rick were together for about 10 years, with him moving in full time about 4 years ago.   He is a wonderful, intelligent man.   He writes historical plays, recently one called Abolition about Frederick Douglas and John Brown that is playing on some PBS channels.   They loved reading together, history, science, poetry.  Also watching movies, doing jigsaw puzzles.   I am so glad she had him in her last years, most of which she was in very good health for her age.


*****

To me, Joan was always a classy woman whose presence, not her, demanded respect. - dc


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Barbara Wenger sends more photos of Joan from earlier days


at Greens party

with Issan Tommy Dorsey


Joan Larkey, Shunko Mike Jamvold, Jordan Thorn (who was with Joan for some time back then)

tea time at Tassajara - names to come