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Friday, June 12, 2015

Wedding Liturgy

Traditional Bali wedding photo from Bali Wedding Organizer. We'd do that but we're scared of heights and Katrinka's the organizer.

Romo Handy, the Buddhist priest who's performing our marriage ceremony, emailed the liturgy - what he and we will say and what happens. It seems pretty good.


Definite Western influence. Equality of the sexes. Some of the wording reminds me of Richard Baker's version. Like many people, I don't like having to speak sentimental stuff in public and I'm sure I'll choke up trying to say my lines. Ugh. That can happen to me reading something vaguely moving or watching a TV ad. I'm thinking about recording my lines, having them broadcast from a hidden speaker, and lip synching them. Do you think anyone would notice?

Here is how it came. We'll make some small changes and I'll offer to make a few grammar corrections if they wish.:


                THE CELEBRATION OF MARRIAGE FOR




                                           AND
 



Led by           :  ________________________________
Place            :  ________________________________      
Date             :  ________________________________
Time             :  ________________________________

THE WELCOME
Family members and friends, and distinguished guests
On behalf of …………………………. & ……………………….., I welcome you.
Namo Buddhaya.
…………………… & ………………… have invited us
To share in the celebration of their marriage
And to be a part of their wedding ceremony

Each one of you here today
Has been chosen as witnesses to the sharing of the vows
To be taken by them both.

We have gathered here to join this couple in a relationship
In which the independence is equal
The dependence mutual
And the obligation reciprocal
Marriage is the joining of two people,
Mind to mind, body to body, and true nature to true nature
You give up your small selves and share trust each other
THE RITES
Commencing the holy matrimony,
Five candles shall be lit on The Buddha’s altar

First, the blue candle representing Devotion,
Lit by …………………………...’s father. (groom)
Followed by the yellow candle representing Wisdom,
Lit by ……………………………’s mother. (groom)
Then, the white candle representing Purity,
Lit by ……………………………’s father. (bride)
Next, the orange candle representing Enthusiasm,
Lit by ……………………………’s mother. (bride)
Lastly, the red candle representing Love,
Lit by the Pandita.

DECLARATION OF INTENTIONS.
Ladies and gentlemen, the distinguished guests, before conducting the holy matrimony further, I would ask the marrying couple:

To both of you, do you have any objections, threats or duress that obstructing you in doing this holy matrimony … ?
                           No, I don’t
……………………………, do you take …………………….. to be your lawful wife in accordance of Buddhist rites ?    ( I do)

……………………………., do you take ………………………… to be your lawful husband in accordance of Buddhist rites ?  ( I do)

Ladies and gentlemen, the distinguished guests, since there is no objection and both of them are willing to take each other as husband and wife, then I will conduct the ceremony.

THE PRAYER.
The Three Jewels are the foundations of Buddhist Tradition and practice, that are Buddha, Dharma (the teaching) and Sangha (the community of holy disciples).
……………………………… and ……………………………. Please take the incense sticks, and repeat the salutation chants toward The Three Jewels after me, word by word.
           ARAHANG SAMMA SAMBUDDHO BHAGAWA
           BUDDHANG BHAGAWANTANG ABHIWADEMI
(Bow the body, for giving honor and prostration to Buddha, The Awakened)
           SWAKKHATO BHAGAVATA DHAMMO
           DHAMMANG NAMASSAMI
(Bow the body, for giving honor and prostration to Dhamma, The Teaching)
           SUPATIPANNO BHAGAVATO SAVAKA SANGGHO
           SANGGHANG NAMAMI
(Bow the body, for giving honor and prostration to Sangha, the community of holy disciples)
(Assistant will take incense sticks and put them on the altar)

THE VOWS.

……………………..………. & ……...…………………… , it is now your time to declare your wedding vows.
………………...........……., please take the incense and repeat the vows word by word after me.
NAMO TASSA BHAGAWATO ARAHATO SAMMA SAMBUDDHASSA.
I, …………...….……… take you ……………...……….. to be my wife, my partner in life. I will cherish our union and love you more each day. I will trust you and respect you, loving you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together. I give you my hand, my heart and my love from this day forward. Sadhu, sadhu, sadhu …………………
Next, ……………………………………. Please take the incense and repeat the vows word by word after me.
NAMO TASSA BHAGAWATO ARAHATO SAMMA SAMBUDDHASSA.
I, ……………......…… take you ………...…………….. to be my husband, my partner in life. I will cherish our union and love you more each day. I will trust you and respect you, loving you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together. I give you my hand, my heart and my love from this day forward. Sadhu, sadhu, sadhu …………………

GIVING AND RECEIVING THE RINGS.

Now before exchanging the rings, let us pray together.
The infinite love in the universe, we hope that the love between ………………………….. & ……………………….. would forever remain unbroken, as the rings, which they will give and receive in your name.

………………………….., please repeat after me as you place the ring on …………………….  finger.
…………………….., I give you this ring as a symbol of our marriage, and of the vows which we have made today. With all that I am and all that I have, I honor you forever more.


………………………….., please repeat after me as you place the ring on …………………….  finger.
………………….…., I give you this ring as a symbol of our marriage, and of the vows which we have made today. With all that I am and all that I have, I honor you forever more.
THE BLESSING.
The bride right palm meet the groom left palm, then the Pandita shall bind/tie their thumbs with the red ribbon.
The parents will cover the couple with yellow cloth.
The Pandita recite the blessing in the Sanskrit words and spatter the marrying couple with holy water. After the Sanskrit recitation, Pandita shall give them the marriage advice according to the Buddha teaching.
The couple parents open the yellow cloth cover and  Pandita open the ribbon tying.
THE PRESENTATION OF AMISA DANA.
The couple offer the amisa dana to Pandita. Amisa Dana is a bundle of incense sticks, red candle, sticks of flower and donation (if the couple wish to do it).
PROCLAIMATION OF THE MARRIAGE.
The couple are facing each other and hold hand in hand.
By the authority committed to me as a Buddhist Pandita, I, Pandita Madya Handy Prasetya, in the name of Buddha, Dhamma and Sanggha, proclaim that ………………………………….. & …………………………………….. are now husband and wife.  ……………………..……… You may now kiss your wife.
THE CLOSING PRAYER.
Shall we pray to The Three Jewels :
          ARAHANG SAMMA SAMBUDDHO BHAGAWA
           BUDDHANG BHAGAWANTANG ABHIWADEMI
(Bow the body, for giving honor and prostration to Buddha, the awakened)
           SWAKKHATO BHAGAVATA DHAMMO
           DHAMMANG NAMASSAMI
(Bow the body, for giving honor and prostration to Dhamma (the teaching)
           SUPATIPANNO BHAGAVATO SAVAKA SANGGHO
           SANGGHANG NAMAMI
(Bow the body, for giving honor and prostration to Sangha (the community of holy disciples)

……………………………….. & …………………………………, now I invite you and your two witnesses to sign the certificate of marriage.

THE WALKOUT.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present you Mr. & Mrs. …………………………………………